2002: Hella Kool

How much cynicism is too much cynicism? What do you find, rather than think? These are the questions.

(updated: 24 April 2024)

Pre and post clubbing photos in early 2002 in front of the new webcam.

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So I spoke to Ella Hooper briefly when she sat down in front of me at the Saint Hotel.

That was most probably in 2002 and most likely on a Sunday, I think.

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At that moment, I was probably by myself – a sign of strength, I would say.

In 1997, Jack Alan liked The Saint too, and everyone would see whoever walked in due to the open plan and elevated corner entry. Good for people who worked out.

So Hooper was wearing a small “one star” badge with her all-male crew around her.  I said something vaguely like “that looks like an unfinished American flag” and she responded like “I don’t know what it means, I see it as representing one world.”

I would’ve kept speaking but her friends all took off and she left too… because I was about to hit it off with her, non?

Initially, perhaps she missed her own dark brown, wavy hair and was aligned with the whole “one-world/age-of-enlightenment” thing too.

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I still am, but it needs to be balanced with a big, hard dose of conspiracy theory/fact – saints versus sinners.

Moreover, “Lightworkers” are known to commit suicide all too easily, because when the darkness hits them, they can’t handle it. And Bonnie, who I remember from school presumably did just that in July, 2020 during covid lockdown.

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But I don’t know enough about her individual case to make a concise comment, but it is so very sad nevertheless. And as Morgs told me at the 2021 reunion something like “life isn’t smooth sailing for everyone, and not everyone makes it.”

They crop themselves (or others) out. The last time I had spoken to her was at the Chevron in 1997 and I was too tipsy and too distracted (and it was too loud) to have any meaningful interaction. In October 2019 I drove through the Tweed Coast and probably should have reached out, but I thought, what’s the point?

So The Saint has a good vibe and is still running to this day, albeit heavily renovated. There’s a good chance that I saw the late Paul Havea singing on the same night that Hooper came through. He was in Eden‘s K for Kool band and instead of clapping my hands, I would click both my fingers and that was kool to Paul and he started grooving all the same. On another Sunday, the DJ came over to me and kindly put me onto Mark Farina and I bought the CD afterwards.

It might’ve been the last CD I ever purchased. My favourite track is at 32.48 and the one after is alright. The rest of it I can pass on.

I saw Simon Grey there once around that period too. He wasn’t playing but he was with his pals and his plans for eternity. I had already recorded some drums at his studio (or was about to) and he played me a track pre-release through the monitors – I think it was this one but am not sure.

Abby died a few years later too due to liver issues, I think. Very sad loss too.

It’s also worth noting that during Grey’s 2018 Pledge Music appeal, on the forum I suggested that he do more “Jazz House” with a swing feel and some months later a Crackazat remix appeared which I included in Ormus King.

Incredible breakdown at 3.25 — Simon Grey – The Galáctica Suite (Crackazat Remix)

So there was another chap of African-descent who, like me, was a regular at James Ash‘s 2-Step night at Salt Nightclub in the sideroom in 1998. I saw him at The Saint at that time and mentioned something about having a girlfriend and he said, “well, if there’s a girl around, then’s there’s one around, and if there isn’t, then there isn’t. It doesn’t bother me that much.”

I was vegan at that point and was going through what was almost certainly the early stages of a Kundalini awakening, which is considered a feminine energy anyway, so his sentiment was (and is) aligned with my own basically.

Moreover, in Tsfat, Israel 2005 along with other students reading ancient Kabbalistic texts, I learned that a wife is ultimately about enabling a man to find his own inner feminine.

[above left and middle – Ascent Hostel]

How easy. But it made sense. I told Hart about Kundalini and he said something like “we think we’re humans but we’re really just monkeys thinking we’re human.” Yet Kundalini doesn’t mean much to people in Tsfat, but Shekhinah (שכינה) or Ruach HaKodesh (רוח הקודש) does. When I did mention something at  Shalom Rav shule about Kundalini (a Sanskrit word,) someone pointed me to a chapter about Abraham’s gifts going to the east.

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And so it should be noted that Solomon was already prepared for to this.

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But with myself still locked into Baal, and without Solomon as my wingman, I wasn’t sure I had found my wife-to-be as yet and even donated my copy of Bahir to another student while I waited to be illuminated and shown the way.

Anyhow, back in January, 2002, I wrote this in one of my essays.

“The Kundalini-type energy engulfed my whole brain. The sensation was like standing up against a tidal wave without moving an inch! When I made the effort not to resist or judge the energy, BAM! A hit of power went to my central brain and my whole being shuddered. My typical mundane awareness had crashed into an ocean of dense consciousness that seemed to underlie the physical universe. A consciousness wave splashed out from my body and passed through the bedroom walls. It looked like an animation strip. Soon a flashback came to my mind. I saw the empty chamber which exists in the centre of the Death Star as seen in the film ‘The Return of the Jedi.’ This was symbolic for my head – an empty space enclosing a God powered fusion reactor in the middle. In this space the ‘light side’ of the force had just attacked my concept of death in order to bring about immortality. However, the attack was not complete because the death star was not fully destroyed! (film scene below)”

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It’s worth noting that I had a very dramatic internal experience like the one above after going quad biking in New Zealand that year on the north island (Paihia). And that’s 2000 years of pain, unworthiness, misery and torture from Jewish exile being cleared. I struggled on the bike and even lost the group in the forest but by the end was trailing the instructor and was winning (if that’s the right word.) It was also the first year of Heartcarving as done on Ruapehu and there were people attempting to copy my style without poles. So NZ, it seems, was the emotional precursor for me to leave Australia and eventually go to Israel but I didn’t know it at the time.

It was heavy-going stuff, and in the West it was very left-field and prior to that I wrote to the Datre channel in late 2000 and got some answers about Kundalini, specifically directed to me.

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I summarised that answer (above right) in October 2002 as follows:

“Datre are said to exist as a collective of souls whose messages are spoken by ‘human channels’. They view the fully-fledged Kundalini experience as a “crash course in trying to understand what physicality is all about” but with someone not necessarily becoming “a grander person if they have gone through the Kundalini.” Kundalini causes a “re-alignment of the physical construct” and “when that alignment is finished, you will see things differently.” The difficulty is that after a re-alignment it may take “a long time to be able to assimilate the information from that point on” because often the Kundalini can cause “an opening of a flood gate of information” whereby one might have to “grab a hold of themselves and stop it [the information], because if they didn’t they would have gone mad.”

Good to know. That summary was part of my research that I was doing into spirituality where I came up with 3 essays in 2002 and for them, composed some diagrams.

But the “Wisdom Cycle” diagram has gone missing. Looking back now, a transformation did indeed take place. For example, I would lie in bed awake and think in only English words and generally only about the future. That sort of changed and my inner-space deepened. “English words” doesn’t mean hearing voices, it just means normal, day-to-day thinking.

So continuing, another person I spoke to at The Saint was Mieke (below far left.) I actually spoke to her outside while we were leaving (but not together) and ended up saying something like “there are good and bad people wherever you go.”

 

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It was an accident that I saw her outside and I had already spoken to her a few times at Saratoga nightclub prior to that where she was working behind the bar, and we both knew the owner there Goofyfoot/Brett who was on Groovetip. Brett was also there that night at Saint and I think there was a function going on at the time. There was also another chap that night that really liked her (one of her co-workers) it seemed and it was an awkward situation for me. Having Jack around would’ve helped but I’ve always enjoyed talking to Brett, though. In fact, I met Cadell and helped get Best of my Love remixed a number of months after that – a song Brett penned.

I never saw Mieke again except on a modelling agency website along with a couple of other people I knew. There was such a strong resonance between us (at least that’s what I felt) that it blew my mind. Sometimes the fuse just blows and it is never reconnected as was the case there. She may not remember me of course, but I’d be curious as to when (and why) she left ‘Toga where she said something like “I saw you burning up the dancefloor” –  I wish.

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I remember first meeting Helen and her guy friend at ‘Toga around that time but I didn’t speak to her for long and I’d be curious if she remembers that night too – but it was likely 2001, though. I even gave them a lift to Greville Street station in the Hyundai Excel and let them use my Nokia 3310 which I disliked due to how much EMF it produced and felt tingly as a result.

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Helen dressed like Aaliyah and was so hot I paid her a compliment saying she must “stick out like a sore thumb” at her school and there was a brief interaction about age: I presume the two weren’t underage for the niteclub but I didn’t ask for their IDs – she mentioned something about a birthday. I don’t know her surname but remember the school the pair went to and it wasn’t mine.

Aaliyah in Tommy Hilfiger was a Freaking Moment♥️ pic.twitter.com/bTuiygmJYI

— Jadyn. (@jadynedition) June 7, 2021

By chance, I saw her again at Mink Bar a few weeks later standing at the bar with some other fellow, but much older, he may have been Greek (I’d never seen him before or after) and yet she appeared excited to see me at which point he placed his hand on her jeans just to rock the boat. It looked like she was trying to dress-down rather than up and maybe she was in overalls yet was naturally blonde. I never saw her again – even upstairs at the Prince Bandroom that was in the same building. Wasn’t stuck-up at all.

It’s crazy how a girl can be with a guy and completely ignore him if there’s another guy she likes or is interested in more. Something like that happened in Byron Bay at La La Land with Anoushka and her boyfriend, both from France at around that time. I’ve also seen girls get with guys just to get close to one of the guy’s friends and project that like onto him. Only a theory. But a lot of girls would flick their hair when I looked at them at ‘Toga. My guess is that it was hard to find younger guys that liked and danced to House music, with a fashion sense and outside of a pub (or rave) context.

[2002 – at a birthday funktion]

I mainly bobbed my head to the off-beat.. so simple… who would’ve thought? I only taught myself actual dance steps over a decade later because I wanted to learn the Melbourne Shuffle. But the best place for me to go on a date was a nightclub… for sure.

A guitarist buddy Kiran told me on MSN messenger that the key there is having detachment. Good guy too and amazing player with some type of Shakti thing happening.

That Eclectic Ladyland show was in 2004 at Dizzy’s and was a follow-up to the Human Interest album launch there.

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The venue had a Friday jam session and it was easy to meet people. I also met keyboardist Adam Rudegeair who spins Black Wax on PBS and Harry before The Cat Empire became an empire. I actually took a guest spot on Rasta Radio on PBS in 1997 with Sinatro. Oddly enough, I found myself starting a reggae band after playing in Skaface, and the promoter shuffled me upstairs to meet him.

A couple of other Rasta guys also came in for an interview and I didn’t understand a word they were saying as they sat across from me. There was an interesting scent around too.

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I was answering the phone to ascended listeners and playing my Songs of Freedom box set as well. Then, almost 20 years later I was playing reggae on the streets of Zion with Yoha and listening to his songs of freedom.

I got into RnB by listening to PBS every Tuesday and Saturday and 1994 was just Da Bomb in terms of tasty beats but I didn’t know anyone that was into it as well.

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Eventually, I wound up at an RnB night at the Warehouse/Salt to see it all for myself. It was so gnarly. I got so much female attention. I was probably the only white guy there.

Anyway, I had posted pics of Kiran on Groovetip with a female companion and I ended up having to take them down because I’m pretty sure it caused a female ex of his a lot of stress, and subsequently him. I’d have to double check. Anyway, best of luck to Mieke and her family. Having Facebook around back then and much cheaper digital cameras would’ve helped.I read in the Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle some years after its release in 1997 that females have a very active “pain body” from millennia of rape and abuse by men, and it’s very difficult for them (and their men) to work through, but they should.”Apart from her personal pain-body, every woman has her share in what could be described as the collective female pain-body — unless she is fully conscious. This consists of accumulated pain suffered by women partly through male subjugation of the female, through slavery, exploitation, rape, childbirth, child loss, and so on, over thousands of years. The emotional or physical pain that for many women precedes and coincides with the menstrual flow is the pain-body in its collective aspect that awakens from its dormancy at that time, although it can be triggered at other times too. It restricts the free flow of life energy through the body, of which menstruation is a physical expression. Let’s dwell on this for a moment and see how it can become an opportunity for enlightenment.” – P158So a year or two later after speaking with Hooper, by chance she walked passed me by herself on the footpath and looked at me, smiling away.I think she had a boyfriend at that point, so live without it… like the rest of Australia!

 

 
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