Category: memoir

2017: Yearning but not Burning!

Without the harsh UV of Australia, the Mediterranean enables all-day (sun) loving.

(last updated: 11 November 2024)

[ 12 Aug 2017 ] [ Vision of Ramala, 1991, p. 222 ]

1) *

[16 Apr 2015 + 29 Aug 2017]

Janet Jackson - If (Bass Cover)

2)

3)

[29 Aug 2017 (TA Beach) + 4 Oct 2016]


↧

4) *

[4 Dec 2017 + 7 Oct 2016] [7 Oct 2016 + 29 Aug 2017]

5)

[20 Dec 2017]

6)

7)

[ self-portrait (TA beach – 30 Jun 2017) insertion – src – CC ]

⚜INXS - Need You Tonight⚜ "Top of The Pops (1987)"

8) *

[ 8 Oct 2017 + 4 April 2018 (Atlit) ]

Suddenly, I was interrupted by a faint shout from the depths of my soul:

‘Wake up Kundalini,’ yelled out a voice identical to my own.

Not surprisingly the Kundalini woke up, but not like a wild serpent but instead like that of a wave gently finishing up its journey onto a sandy beach. The flow emanated from my lower spine and was creeping its way into my brain.

[ memoir – “Introducing the Shechina /  שְׁכִינָה‎ ” – April 2001 ]

9) *

[2016 + 12 Sep 2017]

10) *

[6 July 2017] [9 Jan 2018]


↧

Foo Fighters - New Way Home - Live in the Much Music Canada Studios

11) *

[ 24 Aug 2017, Tower of David ] [22 Jan 2018, Netanya]

"Impressive, extremely impressive Jerusalem!" [24 Aug, 2017]

There’s the 12 stones, that go to the 12 tribes of Israel that the priests wear on the breastplate which a lot of people don’t really talk about.

One of the rabbis who provided the list said “you have to be pure of heart when you’re using the stones that I listed out because they’ll be harmful to you if you are not.”

– Crrow777 + Karen B | ep 527 | 27:00 + 34:57

12)

[ 8 Nov 2018 ] [ Vision of Ramala, 1991, p. 64 ]

13)

[ 19 May 2017 ] [ + self-portrait insertion | 1973/2013 | CC ]


↧

Bryan Adams - Heaven (Live At Wembley 1996)

14)

[ 15 July 2018 + 30 June 2017 ]


↧

Armand Van Helden pulled out this timeless track!

* [ disclaimer ]

Note: photos of Tel Aviv beach are already available publicly [Google search] under a Creative Commons license that may allow similar composite images to be made, even without me having had to travel there. This blog already has a number of composite images, including photos of people who have not met or physically seen me, and who likely don’t know about their use in such images, as a result of their appearance in a photo published under an according license.

Other rights do exist, as well as interpersonal and cultural considerations and tastes, but there are photographers (not all) who encourage their works to be altered and changed – like with music. That includes in private and public spaces.

If people can’t explain their actions and boundaries, other people can do so within that vacuum. On the other side of rights are obligations and  I may not want my photo taken, but does that obligate another not to do so? How are opposing points-of-view reconciled regarding self-image in a dualistic world?

On another level, perhaps the photographer and subject are even one and the same.

[ 20 Aug 2017 ]

I was using a Canon G9X M2 from early 2017 onward, a pocket camera, and taking photos was part of my journey, and the same journey would’ve taken place whether I had it or not. I didn’t even need to (fully) stop to take photos and its high resolution meant I could frame subjects later in editing if need be. This has already been mentioned in this post. Walking along the beach was important for grounding to the earth.

It had a touch focus/shutter and could be used with one hand.

[ 9 July 2017 ]

If only more people shot with cameras instead of guns or syringes.
✓ 10 months ago

Seven Memoirs

(last updated: 18 February 2025)

1) Nightlife

[ ** ]

pic | 2 | 3 | CC
( self-portrait (1997) insertion, portrait extraction, background added | attended )

In early 2004 I went to hear DfP play at Seven. The highlight of the night was hearing the Purple Mix of Controversy and I also briefly spoke to G and she looked so hot it was crazy. I had seen her near me on the dance floor at a mansion party in Toorak in 1996 and Simon (not Grey) knew her. I’m not sure I should’ve been at that party as I wasn’t on the door list (as an actual name) but I do remember somehow being invited – the controversy *. The security guard just let me through because I was with my mum and there was actually no drama at all although I wasn’t expecting a door list – it may have been an oversight or I was assigned as a guest to another person, yet perhaps I should’ve just gone home anyway. It’s something I’d expect from the fashion industry – “your invite has just been revoked.”

Anyhow, it was a great party in what seemed like a basement carport but with adjoining rooms to hangout in.

At one point, I even saw Andrew there (which I found truly bizarre but good) and people weren’t stressed about messing up the carpet or knocking over a statue or anything as would happen upstairs.

So maybe it was a different girl at Seven though, but I doubt it – although it might have been a few years earlier instead at the same place. Brett (not Goldsmith) also knew G and we both saw her once at the Station Hotel with a couple of her friends. I scaled back clubbing around this time too and so that life and its people were basically shelved indefinitely but I was saved from hearing damage. You said what??

Perhaps G doesn’t even know of me. That’s highly likely. I don’t know. Good luck to her. It’s a celebrity status to have.

One encounter I do remember in 1997 was when I bumped into T at Silvers Niteclub near the bar when there was a mad crush to buy drinks. I looked down and said “it’s a tight fit down there” looking at her tight jeans. She looked back at me and corrected: “very tight fit.” I am glad she could confide in me.

That year (or 1998) I also picked up B just up the street from Salt/Warehouse with his crew and took him back to his rather large estate not far away. At the time, he was in my peer group but we didn’t know each other. He was looking for change to call a taxi.

I just offered the group a lift home regardless. I think there were 2 guys and 2 girls in total. Nice guy. He invited me inside, so I went in and upstairs on his tour he said “this place is wild” and there was sort of a party going on but I didn’t stick around. Anyway, on the way out there was a group of girls and I had a chat, and I ended up with a phone number. Impressed, B bid me farewell and I was back on the road. A few days later she never called back. Never saw B again either. With social media things could’ve been different yet I’ve always seen myself as viewing others as an end in themselves, not a means to an end, or a source for attention and admiration. Being super-rich could be challenging if one is constantly dealing with the sycophancy of others and their backstabbing. I read once that a lot of young souls are born into immense wealth and power so they can learn about their impact on others and that would make things even harder.

[*] that same thing happened again in 2004 at a magazine launch party but I did get in anyhow.

Purple Mix: 1:12:30 :-

Controversy Tonight (1981 + 2023) [Prince]

2) Grassroots

[ ** ]

pic | Dec ’21 – Kuranda| CC
(self-portrait (2024) insertion)

Note: after that shot of Nina was taken. Her instagram became private and she stopped posting to it. But just recently (beginning 2024), her number of posts has since dropped to 17.

I’ve seen similar things happen before to other people I have made contact with, even in the most minor way including Yulianna, Laura and Saunalution. Those three were already mentioned in A Tribute to David (Sep ’22). These are just observations though. It doesn’t mean much in and of itself.

I was just staying at the same campground – The Billabong in Kuranda in November ’21 for a few weeks and even spoke to an indigenous guy there too, Sony… interesting lineage too.

So I never saw or spoke to her or her friends ever again as I thereafter decided to head toward Brisbane to build a trailer, but I salvaged Nina’s phone that she left behind. I found it lying face down on the open grass with its highly cracked screen. I had a passing interest in fashion photography too at the time and left that behind myself – my broken main camera was part of the problem.

Interestingly, Carmen who was at The Billabong in Kuranda hasn’t posted main photos to her IG (Jan 2024) since then either.

 

So Nina appeared out of the blue, took it, said something about whether I would be seeing them in Yungaburra, placed it in her back pocket and left quickly.

So as with her other two friends, no online communication at all at any point and no friending or following allowed. Yet the strange part was my messaging associated with that phone incident was deleted on FB, by FB, perhaps a week or two later.

So is she still in Australia? Why?

homeaffairs.gov.au/about-us/what-we-do/borderwatch/reporting

My maternal grandmother Ina (Faina) grew up in Hamburg, Germany but was born in Oryol, Russia.

In the late 80s, she returned from a holiday there bringing me back a red sweater. It felt awkward wearing it to say the least but I still appreciated it, and her of course greatly.

There was also another long-sleeve white t-shirt – not shown here – and I think it said something about Perestroika and/or Glasnost. Would they trigger a nuclear blast?

Perhaps a demolition job?

So when I received that t-shit my main experience up until that point about Russia at school was a drill where we hid under tables and away from windows in the event of a nuclear attack so a t-shirt was a welcome relief.

The drill was in room 1, yet what presented a real danger was the tree (2) on the lawn. I ran into it once during a soccer game waiting for someone to kick me the ball. Yet I had seen War Games (1983,) so to me the drill could’ve been justified, or maybe just fear-fodder?

I will be the Russians

In Europe, I would have been more fearful of stay-behind armies like those of Operation Gladio that may readily turn on civilian populations when real threats don’t materialize, hiding weapons in networks of empty petrol-station tanks. Who knows if this organization has actually disbanded?

Anyway, Ina ended up hating boarding school in Germany due to pre-war persecution, and even returning there over 80 years later brought back too many negative memories for her including the death of her father (Simon Kaplan) where he owned a frames and casings factory – she thought about him all the time. The factory was on Schanzenstraße, Hamburg yet he was born in Mogilev, Belarus in 1888.

[ Hamburg (1936 estimated) – Simon, Rita (daughter), Elizabeth (wife), Joachim Snapir (Ina friend/partner,) Ina (daughter) ]

In 1938, the year of Kristallnacht, Simon Kaplan was called to Gestapo headquarters for unknown reasons. In the family, there was an argument about whether he should comply or flee, but he went – I think he wanted to avoid losing the factory and he ended up at Oberschlesien or else Auschwitz by 1942 for the “final solution.” So what were Nina’s grandparents and great-grandparents doing during WWII? Maybe that’s something for her to explore in meditation? Did they have dreadlocks?

Also with Nina: Dustin Bak and Max.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Diveakssh Schae (@diveakssh)

So over 20 years ago, Martin made it out of Australia from Byron Bay, and back to Germany, but his profile pic disappeared too quickly after I friended him recently: just an observation though. He was/is a really interesting guy – I mentioned him here.

Max was still here in April ’22.

He doesn’t look too keen to leave either! They all seemed like really nice people too.

I was initially at my computer one night in the dining area when the 3 or 4 approached me for a lift to a music festival.

Abrupt request… didn’t they have vehicles or something? How would I stack them all in? Could I tow them in on bicycles or have them stretching out on my bed in the canopy? Could’ve been a fun night though.

But I am aware of the German style where the camaraderie can turn on a dime (the Fascist switch??)

…like with Israelis (the Massadah switch??) But that’s just my experience anyway – and a generalisation at that.

Also, all my grandparents spoke German fluently, and my surname Wajsbrem equates from Weiss Braue in German  – White Eyebrow. Wait, so I’m one of them?! Well, Frederick was born in Meiningen, Germany.

But the other 2 (Helen + Oskar) were actually Polish (Białystok + Warsaw.)

Brem could also equate to brew in Polish – same meaning.

Nina and Dustin seemed so switched-on and relaxed, so how are they going now regardless of residence and activity? Do they have a blog of any kind of their travels? Are they still together? As they say, it’s the journey and not the destination. Is there a modelling portfolio people should see?

Do they think about tying the knot here? Have they found Shakti? Are they permanent residents or new immigrants?

A child born in Australia to foreign parents is entitled to full Australian citizenship, giving them the same rights and benefits as other Australian citizens.
– src

That said, I saw a photo of Nina in Bali in ~2023 quad-biking but then came back into Australia. Good for her, I had a great time quading in NZ in 2002. I think an electric unicycle could be even better… with an airbag!

3) Vantage Points

(1 2 ) 3 4 5 6 …

* pics 1 and 2 were cropped from much larger pictures taken as general city scenes in quick succession with no person in particular selected to be photographed. It was a Zoom-In edit. Connotative meaning can be applied but hasn’t been inferred. Pic 3 is a screenshot from a music link further down.

A person can be at the ‘crossroads’ and not even know it until they see other perspectives of themselves later.

Crosshairs too, for example in political machinations or targeted civillians.

From my own reading of Maitreya, often it takes one’s own death to see the bigger picture missed while leading a myopic life – in a life review away from the Earth plane.

src

Also, in a piece from 2001, they mention the Hall of Mirrors as related to 9/11 terrorism.

src

Fear of death, and fear overall is the small self afraid of the big self, non??

Yet, who has ever directly seen the back of their head… even with a mirror? Everyone has a blindspot: perhaps it was meant to be that way? It gets people to the hairdresser, right?

At an end-of-year work meetup in ~2002, I was sitting next to one chap who said something like “If anyone were to kill any of my two daughters, I would want them dead.” The topic went on for a couple of minutes, I think he’d already had a few drinks, not sure, and then I said, “well, what if one daughter killed the other one?” After a few long moments, he replied “Bastard!” End of topic. Blindspot revealed.

But I never brought up the topic with him and I have no idea why he did. I think he carried a photo of them in his wallet as they were children. I don’t remeber much more of the conversation either.

Killer Kids are an uncomfortable topic…

src

…so too is part of Jewry wanting to kill another part, in what might be an active war at present with Zionists targeting religious Zionists although it is a clandestine one whereby “Sabbateans are chameleons taking on the identity of their targets, destroying them from within.” –

src

It certainly deserves verification and wouldn’t surprise me – when the parasite becomes predator and the phenomenon has history.

Note, the author of that article is Jewish.

So just as Cain killed sibling Abel (a shepherd) another shepherd (14 y/o) was murdered in April 2024 in Israel but afterward equipment was seized from his house during mourning. Sabbatai Zevi was considerred a false messiah, are there more today?

Speaking of which, in Ormus King 9 as written in Queensland in September 2019, the anti-Christ almost becomes the world’s messiah as a usurper.

It might even be worth constructing a 10th film where he/it actually does to make it more lifelike. The Sabbatean edition. Or else, one may just look at the news – that is the Sabbatean edition!

In Australia, prior to ~2019, I would never have guessed that a large part of the “genocide” against the indigenous was done by natives to themselves and they were already warring with each other prior to Cook arriving, having different languages and geographies.

The Native Police were Australia’s own Einsatzgruppen – the ‘willing executioners’ of whom historians of Nazi Germany have investigated, pondering the question of how the nation of Bach and Beethoven could also produce mass murderers in uniform. That the Native Police were Indigenous men willing to serve for rations, tobacco and a pittance, and to pursue and kill other black people should not surprise us. Colonial governments made sure that men enlisted in, say, Victoria, were used in Queensland, far from their own country – they generally could not even speak the same language as their quarry.

It was no novelty for empires to use its subject peoples to enforce or extend their rule. Imperial Russia had its Cossacks, France its Spahis d’Afrique in Algeria, East Africa the King’s African Rifles and British India a huge army whose Sepoys – Bengalis and Madrassis, Gurkhas and Sikhs – fought to gain and protect Britain’s hold on the sub-continent. That settlement in Australia was assisted by blacks killing blacks is a tragic irony of Australia’s history, but not one we should avoid.
– src

Note, they were given elephant guns to enact maximum damage and someone in far north Queensland told me that there are longstanding enmities that still exist to this day and shape police recruitment.

[Queensland, 1864]

I also read in a gallery that the native police force was initially setup by a German guy to conduct “dispersals” and pave the way for settlement.

4) Packing and Stacking

* Packing up from my first ever gig. The final track was Hey Jude, as seen on the chart. This was at the Polyglot Puppet Theatre in 1994. John was playing bass. It took a few nights to get things tight.

I became interested in the drums in 1988 when I heard someone play a beat while I was in the schoolyard which really lifted my spirit. Could’ve missed it though.

I also really liked the drum solo at a Lionel Richie “Outrageous Tour” concert in 1987 – the first concert I went to.

Ricky (1954 – 2013) on drums.

Ricky Lawson drum solo

I learned piano for many years but quit to start drums when I was 12.

I tried guitar when I was 18 but didn’t like the feel of metal under my fingers and the plastic plectrums.
Q: Is there any instrument where one can avoid gripping metal or plastic?
A: Percussion.

[ 2003 with Toby | 2003 at Blue Note NYC – Marcus Miller’s rig]

Musical instruments should also have health warning stickers – like with cigarettes regarding hearing damage. Def Jam or Deaf Jam records? Def Leppard or Deaf Leppard? Playing instruments can also strain the spine – ask Phil Collins. Bassist Charles who I knew back in high school started doing yoga back then and using earplugs – smart guy.

[ early 1995, Bali – taking hits from the Bong Song ]

Cypress Hill - Hits From The Bong - 8/14/1994 - Woodstock 94

Anyway, the first late-night film I went to was the audience-participation Blues Brothers at the Valhalla starting at around 11pm.

[ pic ]

I was almost asleep but then I could see a flying pole hurtling toward me.

The pole was catapulted to reach the top of the screen and there were people shouting at me across the room to watch out. This was at 3:26 below:

The Blues Brothers Car Chase (3/3)

I was in the first or second row, wearing a suit and even had my brother next to me. I was so tired, I didn’t move an inch and it just missed me. It all made so much sense!

A few years later in France my own ski almost landed on my head after reaching a similar height during a stack and a week or two later people were shouting at me from a chairlift as I was in a collision course with a traverse track.

Stacking up the near misses …keeps life interesting.

5) Backpack Testimonial

(created: 1 December 2018)

I bought my Aiking Australia daypack sometime in 1994 for around AUD$200 after a hiking teacher at Timbertop spoke so highly of the brand at the end of 1993.

But at Timbertop, my pack wasn’t Aiking. It’s still intact today, and was used by my brother as well before me – a full-size hiking backpack.

Interestingly, Aiking (now One Planet) have supplied the school ever since.

I used the pack as my school bag in 1995 and 1996, and also for uni – it has never failed me. It is neither too large, nor too small and I can even use a larger pack on my back and then have this on my front if need be.

It is going in for its second repair, and it needed one in around 2000. It has brutally strong canvas and has an extended oversize YKK zip around the perimeter. All the inner seams are still fully intact. The black cordura base is also in top condition. This pack has been so dependable, I have almost taken it for granted, but not so much that I throw it around.

[ St. Anton, Jan 2012 ]

Perhaps one day it can be reissued, and like the old Gibson guitars that have their fadings, stains and wear marks recreated – this pack can also have its patina recreated so that everyone can experience its good looks and high build quality. It is getting a wash at this point, yet I doubt it’ll lose its soul glow.

Well done to the One Planet team.

 

[ ** disclaimer ** ]

visual and illustrative representations only and not for further distribution unless otherwise stated. No bearing with any intent or interaction. I do not know the person(s) shown above and have not met them. There is a strong randomness factor too in the selection. They may or may not know about this derivative image, as with their associated photographer and uploader. It is enabled and encouraged by the Creative Commons license attached to the original source image. This is part of a limited series exploring old photos and creating high-quality, composite images related to new music and new music mashups.
✓ 6 months ago

1991: Kickstarting the Bucket List

Don’t grow old – just evolve.

(last updated: 9 August 2025)

Purchased in the early 80’s, that amplifier (pic 3) is still sought after to this day.


And for me, coupled with InterDyn P2 speakers of the early 90’s, should be on any audiophile’s bucket list. Only moderate volume levels are required. Slow jams of the 90’s were off the chain.

Boyz II Men - Uhh Ahh (1991)

Those speakers were bought for a “modern” Denon PMA-1080R, which was a good amp back then, but the sound just wasn’t in the same league as the vintage amp that was brought back to life. The Acoustic Research speakers stored away were crackling – they probably should have just been repaired.

The CD player was a Technics SL-PS900. I read Hi-Fi magazines back then and it got an unbelievable review. Our neighbour from Brunei who ended up at HP after RMIT, Lawrance, was also into Hi-Fi gear. He followed on from Mikito with a bunch of other tertiary students from Asia. They had a Marantz amp and kept a lot of vinyl. I think his speakers were JBL but he wanted Infinity. He really got into Luther Vandross. Really nice guy too, and showed me Windows 3 before anyone else and even helped me install it, as well as scan for viruses. This made me a sort of go-to guy at school.

I kind of struggled with fashion back then, I didn’t really know what I liked and what I didn’t. As long as I wasn’t in Stussy pants: I wasn’t good enough at skateboarding for those! They would turn me into a try-hard! I had gray Stussy shorts though as they weren’t as obvious.

[ 1993 ]

Justin and Julian said they met Lawrance on the way back from Chapel Street on the tram and he gave them a whole heap of KFC for free. I’m pretty sure it was them, but not 100%. At one point I gave Lawrance our Paula Abdul Spellbound CD to keep – I think it was brought back from Chicago by my mum and no one really played it. But his whole apartment rocked it, though.

My mum had been in Chicago representing a gallery alongside Tom Spender at the CIAE Art Expo (1991?)

She just went into a record store and asked for their tips. She brought back Diamonds and Pearls with a special edition hologram cover that I didn’t see in Australia. I couldn’t believe the simplicity of the Cream beat.

Prince & The New Power Generation - Cream (Official Music Video)

So I made a mashup with Paula in 2022.

OAKK and Paula Abdul - Madeleine Rush (RaveDJ, 2022)

The chorus is only gifted at 2:15. Incredible build-up.

One of Justin’s friends Charles (not from my school) gave me his Billy Hyde drum pad around that time not long after I met him at his home. I couldn’t believe it. It was almost new and he was around my age. He said he never used it. I used it all the time.

People, especially friends and neighbours could really gift more to each other and often it does more for the giver than the receiver because it comes back in multiples. If you have something you don’t want or need, give it to someone who does. So simple, right?

So one of the guys at the apartment with a souped up bronze Honda Civic was installing a new radio or sub-woofer and I was trying to screw in a bolt behind the radio with my small hand. I couldn’t see what I was doing and at one point I said “Have you gotta light?” and everyone standing around screamed with laughter. It didn’t matter – I got the bolt in regardless. No smoko required. Incidentally, that Civic had “Mugen” emblazoned on it, but I don’t think it was a real Mugen Civic. Not sure.

That was at the back of the building where I often went to hit a tennis ball and the apartment block is still standing to this day.

src

A few years later the whole apartment had cleared: maybe 1995 but Lawrance is still around somewhere – if you can get his attention for a test drive or test listen.

Anyway, by the late 90’s I was driving a gray Hyundai Excel (with Desmond in the boot) and had learned to double-clutch and rev-match. A lot of fun. I took an Indian girl from uni once for a spin and she blurted out “ooh, I love the way you drive.” I thought it was only backies that got the girls.


So at one point, I was close to buying a new car, and located a strangely inexpensive but great condition 1991 Honda Civic CRX Si-R VTEC. It belonged to a relative of a mechanic I knew at the time and I saw it gleaming in his workshop one day. His cousin may have had trouble offloading it because it was a 2-seater but wanted to keep the radio from it. After a few tense calls, I took it for a test drive and it was lit, especially for the price.

At $28000 it was about $2000 more than the Nissan Bluebird (1995 LX,  series 2) that I could’ve sold – money which I didn’t have. Maybe he could’ve dropped the price without the radio?? Using its VIN, I checked from the side of the road to see if it had an accident history over the phone and it did not. It looked like this and had the rare glass roof option.

Flooring it, Jeremy who somehow found me that day, blurted out “it’s like an M3!” And it was. Being a 2-seater sports meant I couldn’t get any more help buying it. I was out of contact with Lawrance – he may have wanted it, or his friend. Mugen not needed.

So another “close but no cigar moment” and another one for the bucket!

While driving, Lawrance turned to me once and said “you know, I can beat any car in a straight line race.” It was difficult getting him to actually do that or explain, but he sort of showed me how to anticipate a green light, and said something like “you know, you’re not really allowed to do that.”
✓ 3 weeks ago

2002: Hella Kool

How much cynicism is too much cynicism? What do you find, rather than think? These are the questions.

(updated: 18 February 2025)

Pre and post clubbing photos in early 2002 in front of the new webcam.

[ src | 2 ]

So I spoke to Ella Hooper briefly when she sat down in front of me at the Saint Hotel.

Killing Heidi - Live Without It (House of Hits, 2000)

That was most probably in 2002 and most likely on a Sunday, I think.

[src]

At that moment, I was probably by myself – a sign of strength, I would say.

In 1997, Jack Alan liked The Saint too, and everyone would see whoever walked in due to the open plan and elevated corner entry. Good for people who worked out.

So Hooper was wearing a small “one star” badge with her all-male crew around her.  I said something vaguely like “that looks like an unfinished American flag” and she responded like “I don’t know what it means, I see it as representing one world.”

I would’ve kept speaking but her friends all took off and she left too… because I was about to hit it off with her, non?

Initially, perhaps she missed her own dark brown, wavy hair and was aligned with the whole “one-world/age-of-enlightenment” thing too.

[src]

I still am, but it needs to be balanced with a big, hard dose of conspiracy theory/fact – saints versus sinners.

Interestingly, Tania Doko was sitting at a table with her female friend – she smiled and looked over at me a few times. Wait, maybe it was only a lookalike and she was gazing at someone behind me.

So perhaps I should have gone over and said “well done on escaping from the television!” Richard Gere once said the only pickup lines that work are the ones created in the moment. So she would’ve responded “lucky me!”

Anyway, “Lightworkers” are known to commit suicide all too easily, because when the darkness hits them, they can’t handle it. And Bonnie, who I remember from school presumably did just that in July, 2020 during covid lockdown.

[ src | 2 ]

But I don’t know enough about her individual case to make a concise comment, but it is so very sad nevertheless. In fact, according to these snippets the cause of death is unknown, and no Will was left either.

1 2

Anyway, best wishes and long life to her friends and family. Paul Havea mentioned further down died in December, 2007.

Interestingly, as mentioned in this post, no cause of death was given to Patrick Timpone and Fentanyl was blamed in the comments.

Also, “Prince had ‘exceedingly high’ level of fentanyl in body when he died.” [src] Good thing they actually tested for it – was Patrick actually tested for Fentanyl? Was Bonnie? Michael Jackson could’ve been targeted while his doctor was waiting around outside his room, is one theory I’ve read. Do assassins come armed with syringes these days? Are drones used?

src

So as Morgs told me at the 2021 reunion something like “life isn’t smooth sailing for everyone, and not everyone makes it.”

They crop themselves (or others) out. The last time I had spoken to Bonnie was at the Chevron in 1997 and I was too tipsy and too distracted (and it was too loud) to have any meaningful interaction. In 2019 I drove through the Tweed Coast and probably should have reached out, but I thought, what’s the point?

[ Tweed Coast – 21 October 2019 ]

So The Saint had a good vibe and is still running to this day, albeit heavily renovated. There’s a good chance that I saw the late Paul “Pauly” Havea singing on the same night that Hooper came through. He was in Eden‘s K for Kool band and instead of clapping my hands, I clicked both my fingers and Pauly started grooving all the same. I’d only spoken to him on two occasions.

Eden essentially asked me if I wanted to drum for his new band at one point, but I turned it down and said there’d be better drummers for it – professionals. In hindsight, I probably should’ve switched to percussion at that point. But that would mean less money for the rest of the band.

[ 30 May 2017 ]

It’s very easy for bands to overlook percussionists, but in Israel two decades later, whenever I hooked up with street players, they’d always invite me back and got waaay more money and crowds whenever I was around. But that could’ve been due to my unique playing style rather than percussionists in general. In fact, one guy Chemy asked me to join his touring band in the USA, but I said my hearing’s too f##### to join any band. He said I had “tasty” rhythms. Moreover, by 1970, Miles Davis was playing with percussionists in Bitches Brew but the numerous Israeli Jazz players I knew weren’t interested in percussionists, or so it seemed, and perhaps even less in their audience.

So back to the Saint, on another Sunday, the DJ came over to me and kindly put me onto Mark Farina and I bought the CD afterwards.

It might’ve been the last CD I ever purchased. My favourite track is at 32.48 and the one after is alright. The rest of it I can pass on.

I saw Simon Grey there once around that period too. He wasn’t playing but he was with his pals and his plans for eternity. I had already recorded some drums at his studio (or was about to) and he played me a track pre-release through the monitors – I think it was this one but am not sure.

Abby died a few years later too due to liver issues, I think. Very sad loss too.

It’s also worth noting that during Grey’s 2018 Pledge Music appeal, on the forum I suggested that he do more “Jazz House” with a swing feel and some months later a Crackazat remix appeared which I included in Ormus King.

Simon Grey - The Galáctica Suite (Crackazat Remix)

Incredible breakdown at 3.25 — Simon Grey – The Galáctica Suite (Crackazat Remix)

So there was another chap of African-descent who, like me, was a regular at James Ash‘s 2-Step night at Salt Nightclub in the sideroom in 1998. I saw him at The Saint at that time and mentioned something about having a girlfriend and he said, “well, if there’s a girl around, then’s there’s one around, and if there isn’t, then there isn’t. It doesn’t bother me that much.”

I was vegan at that point and was going through what was almost certainly the early stages of a Kundalini awakening, which is considered a feminine energy anyway, so his sentiment was (and is) aligned with my own basically.

Moreover, in Tsfat, Israel 2005 along with other students reading ancient Kabbalistic texts, I learned that a wife is ultimately about enabling a man to find his own inner feminine.

[above left and middle – Ascent Hostel]

How easy. But it made sense. I told Hart about Kundalini and he said something like “we think we’re humans but we’re really just monkeys thinking we’re human.” Yet Kundalini doesn’t mean much to people in Tsfat, but Shekhinah (שכינה) or Ruach HaKodesh (רוח הקודש) does. When I did mention something at  Shalom Rav shule about Kundalini (a Sanskrit word,) someone pointed me to a chapter about Abraham’s gifts going to the east.

src

And so it should be noted that Solomon was already prepared for to this.

src

But with myself still locked into Baal, and without Solomon as my wingman, I wasn’t sure I had found my wife-to-be as yet and even donated my copy of Bahir to another student while I waited to be illuminated and shown the way.

Anyhow, back in January, 2002, I wrote this in one of my essays.

“The Kundalini-type energy engulfed my whole brain. The sensation was like standing up against a tidal wave without moving an inch! When I made the effort not to resist or judge the energy, BAM! A hit of power went to my central brain and my whole being shuddered. My typical mundane awareness had crashed into an ocean of dense consciousness that seemed to underlie the physical universe. A consciousness wave splashed out from my body and passed through the bedroom walls. It looked like an animation strip. Soon a flashback came to my mind. I saw the empty chamber which exists in the centre of the Death Star as seen in the film ‘The Return of the Jedi.’ This was symbolic for my head – an empty space enclosing a God powered fusion reactor in the middle. In this space the ‘light side’ of the force had just attacked my concept of death in order to bring about immortality. However, the attack was not complete because the death star was not fully destroyed! (film scene below)”

src

It’s worth noting that I had a very dramatic internal experience like the one above after going quad biking in New Zealand that year on the north island (Paihia). And that’s 2000 years of pain, unworthiness, misery and torture from Jewish exile being cleared. I struggled on the bike and even lost the group in the forest but by the end was trailing the instructor and was winning (if that’s the right word.) It was also the first year of Heartcarving as done on Ruapehu and there were people attempting to copy my style without poles. So NZ, it seems, was the emotional precursor for me to leave Australia and eventually go to Israel but I didn’t know it at the time.

It was heavy-going stuff, and in the West it was very left-field and prior to that I wrote to the Datre channel in late 2000 and got some answers about Kundalini, specifically directed to me.

1 2

I summarised that answer (above right) in October 2002 as follows:

“Datre are said to exist as a collective of souls whose messages are spoken by ‘human channels’. They view the fully-fledged Kundalini experience as a “crash course in trying to understand what physicality is all about” but with someone not necessarily becoming “a grander person if they have gone through the Kundalini.” Kundalini causes a “re-alignment of the physical construct” and “when that alignment is finished, you will see things differently.” The difficulty is that after a re-alignment it may take “a long time to be able to assimilate the information from that point on” because often the Kundalini can cause “an opening of a flood gate of information” whereby one might have to “grab a hold of themselves and stop it [the information], because if they didn’t they would have gone mad.”

Good to know. That summary was part of my research that I was doing into spirituality where I came up with 3 essays in 2002 and for them, composed some diagrams.

But the “Wisdom Cycle” diagram has gone missing. Looking back now, a transformation did indeed take place. For example, I would lie in bed awake and think in only English words and generally only about the future. That sort of changed and my inner-space deepened. “English words” doesn’t mean hearing voices, it just means normal, day-to-day thinking.

So continuing, another person I spoke to at The Saint was Mieke (below far left.) I actually spoke to her outside while we were leaving (but not together) and ended up saying something like “there are good and bad people wherever you go.”

 

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A post shared by Mieke Baxter (@miekejade)


It was an accident that I saw her outside and I had already spoken to her a few times at Saratoga nightclub prior to that where she was working behind the bar, and we both knew the owner there Goofyfoot/Brett who was on Groovetip. Brett was also there that night at Saint and I think there was a function going on at the time. There was also another chap that night that really liked her (one of her co-workers) it seemed and it was an awkward situation for me. Having Jack around would’ve helped but I’ve always enjoyed talking to Brett, though. In fact, I met Cadell and helped get Best of my Love remixed a number of months after that – a song Brett penned.

Olivia Newton-John - Best Of My Love (Ashley Cadell Club Mix)

I never saw Mieke again except on a modelling agency website along with a couple of other people I knew. There was such a strong resonance between us (at least that’s what I felt) that it blew my mind. Sometimes the fuse just blows and it is never reconnected as was the case there. She may not remember me of course, but I’d be curious as to when (and why) she left ‘Toga where she said something like “I saw you burning up the dancefloor” –  I wish.

[src]

I remember first meeting Helen and her guy friend at ‘Toga around that time but I didn’t speak to her for long and I’d be curious if she remembers that night too – but it was likely 2001, though. I even gave them a lift to Greville Street station in the Hyundai Excel and let them use my Nokia 3310 which I disliked due to how much EMF it produced and felt tingly as a result.

[ 2000 ]

Helen dressed like Aaliyah and was so hot I paid her a compliment saying she must “stick out like a sore thumb” at her school and there was a brief interaction about age: I presume the two weren’t underage for the niteclub but I didn’t ask for their IDs – she mentioned something about a birthday. I don’t know her surname but remember the school the pair went to and it wasn’t mine.

By chance, I saw her again at Mink Bar a few weeks later standing at the bar with some other fellow, but much older, he may have been Greek (I’d never seen him before or after) and yet she appeared excited to see me at which point he placed his hand on her jeans just to rock the boat. It looked like she was trying to dress-down rather than up and maybe she was in overalls yet was naturally blonde. I never saw her again – even upstairs at the Prince Bandroom that was in the same building. Wasn’t stuck-up at all.

It’s crazy how a girl can be with a guy and completely ignore him if there’s another guy she likes or is interested in more. Something like that happened in Byron Bay at La La Land with Anoushka and her boyfriend, both from France at around that time. I’ve also seen girls get with guys just to get close to one of the guy’s friends and project that like onto him. Only a theory. But a lot of girls would flick their hair when I looked at them at ‘Toga. My guess is that it was hard to find younger guys that liked and danced to House music, with a fashion sense and outside of a pub (or rave) context.

[2002 – at a birthday funktion]

I mainly bobbed my head to the off-beat.. so simple… who would’ve thought? I only taught myself actual dance steps over a decade later because I wanted to learn the Melbourne Shuffle. But the best place for me to go on a date was a nightclub… for sure.

A guitarist buddy Kiran told me on MSN messenger that the key there is having detachment. Good guy too and amazing player with some type of Shakti thing happening.

Eclectic Ladyland.wmv

That Eclectic Ladyland show was in 2004 at Dizzy’s and was a follow-up to the Human Interest album launch there.

[src]

The venue had a Friday jam session and it was easy to meet people. I also met keyboardist Adam Rudegeair who spins Black Wax on PBS and Harry before The Cat Empire became an empire. I actually took a guest spot on Rasta Radio on PBS in 1997 with Sinatro. Oddly enough, I found myself starting a reggae band after playing in Skaface, and the promoter shuffled me upstairs to meet him.

A couple of other Rasta guys also came in for an interview and I didn’t understand a word they were saying as they sat across from me. There was an interesting scent around too.

src 2 3 4 5

I was answering the phone to ascended listeners and playing my Songs of Freedom box set as well. Then, almost 20 years later I was playing reggae on the streets of Zion with Yoha and listening to his songs of freedom.

Sophian Guitar/Singing - Redemption Song

I got into RnB by listening to PBS every Tuesday and Saturday and 1994 was just Da Bomb in terms of tasty beats but I didn’t know anyone that was into it as well.

[src]

Taste Your Love- Horace Brown

Eventually, I wound up at an RnB night at the Warehouse/Salt to see it all for myself. It was so gnarly. I got so much female attention. I was probably the only white guy there.

Intro to WKD 97-98

Anyway, I had posted pics of Kiran on Groovetip with a female companion and I ended up having to take them down because I’m pretty sure it caused a female ex of his a lot of stress, and subsequently him. I’d have to double check. Anyway, best of luck to Mieke and her family. Having Facebook around back then and much cheaper digital cameras would’ve helped.

I read in the Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle some years after its release in 1997 that females have a very active “pain body” from millennia of rape and abuse by men, and it’s very difficult for them (and their men) to work through, but they should.

“Apart from her personal pain-body, every woman has her share in what could be described as the collective female pain-body — unless she is fully conscious. This consists of accumulated pain suffered by women partly through male subjugation of the female, through slavery, exploitation, rape, childbirth, child loss, and so on, over thousands of years. The emotional or physical pain that for many women precedes and coincides with the menstrual flow is the pain-body in its collective aspect that awakens from its dormancy at that time, although it can be triggered at other times too. It restricts the free flow of life energy through the body, of which menstruation is a physical expression. Let’s dwell on this for a moment and see how it can become an opportunity for enlightenment.” – P158

So a year or two later after speaking with Hooper, by chance she walked passed me by herself on the footpath and looked at me, smiling away. I was living and working in that area at the time.

I think she had a boyfriend at that point, so live without it… like the rest of Australia! Lucky her!
✓ 6 months ago

Beyond 2000: When “Accidents” Happen

…no play when away.

(last updated: 20 November 2024)

The first dog we bought Coco (a Border Collie for $200) died at a few months old after she ate snail poison in the garden.

My mum had a discussion with the gardener in the morning before driving to school, but the poison was laid nevertheless. The gardener, Vince (who has since passed himself) said that he’d never had a problem with that snail poison in other homes. After the death, I recall Vince showing me the box that said “pet-safe” on it or something like that.

So when we arrived home from school we called out for Coco but she never ran up to greet us at the gate with her happy self. The dog was actually lying near the gate to greet us (see red below,) but she had sadly passed by that stage.

I never saw Coco dead – my mum did – and the gardener was fired, but I am still in contact with the gardener’s son who is a gardener himself and remembers the story. I later saw the bright blue snail poison squashed into the bricks of the garden path (see blue above.) I think Coco had removed the pellets from the dirt to eat or test out. It was really sad but we vowed to get another dog soon.

Our next dog, Socks was returned after a week due to him being too placid. He turned into a champion show dog.

After that, we ended up with Toby who was one of the last to go due to a wonky ear. He ended up super intelligent and we taught him heaps of tricks. Really I think all owners of working dogs should be training them as much as they can, especially if they are out of their natural environment.

Toby was once taken from outside Fuji restaurant where we were eating (with Miriam as standing above) and kept for a few weeks by some type of dog-napper who didn’t bother to check the engraved collar.

[pic]

We searched and searched and never found him. We stuck up posters too. One day we got a call and salvaged him. He seemed contented. The woman who took him thought he had been abandoned because he wasn’t tied up. It could have been far worse.

He used to lick windows, perhaps she would’ve kept him otherwise?

Interestingly, later on, that restaurant ended up abandoned for what could’ve been around 20 years.

Eventually Toby could go to Como park by himself and run around at Thursday night football training and then walk home. He could even cross roads by himself if he had the chance. We avoided all that, though.

He liked to chase buses, from the perimeter of the park on the grass, but never running onto the road.

As mentioned, I made a short film with him and it was shown to the students of VCE Media units 1+2 (for Year 10) – Karen may remember, she was one of the teachers at the time. But that video is no more. However, I did record a short clip of Desmond in 2007, the sequel dog to Toby:

Slim Dusty - Duncan (featuring Desmond - Blue Healer)

Like many dogs, Desmond had a degree of separation anxiety and unless tied up, could follow me into shops – even supermarket aisles. Yet he had more style than most. With Toby, this wasn’t a problem because we followed the breeder’s advice and let him welp into the night while he was meant to go to sleep in the laundry as a very young puppy – he was left alone. And being more independently minded, it was easy to make a short film with Toby. Then again, it was never a concern for Des to run away.

Des handled puppy school with ease – so much so that he was offered multiple scholarships at various Ivy League schools, which he turned down in favour for eventual professorship at Harvard apparently – but he never told us directly.

Toby rejected the idea of puppy school altogether and even death, favouring the notion of transcending the Earthly realm and merging with an 8th density consciousness.

Back on a serious note, in a related story, in the early 2000s, I was housesitting for someone in my family and also pet-minding.

As I enjoyed the view, and watched an EWF DVD, for a few days I also saw Rozy (the Cocker Spaniel) rolling around on her neck and scratching her head.

Earth Wind & Fire - System of Survival • Get Away [Live in Japan 1990]

I ignored her until one day I saw her attempting to push off her collar in the front garden (below right.) She was actually positioning herself so that I could see her doing it as her system of survival.

I took a closer look and there was a rubber band around her neck hidden amongst her hair and below the other collar.

The rubber band had caused a deep gash in some parts of her neck and there was blood and pus. I took it off and applied antiseptic. I also cut off some of the hair around her neck. She survived and recovered without me needing to go to a vet, but had it remained it could’ve been far worse.

I remember the neighbour a few days earlier coming over and playing with the dog. There was no one watching him – I just let him do his thing and I didn’t know him – I am pretty sure he came over especially to play with the dog.

Was it malicious – did he want to hurt the dog, the family or even me in the process? (I would’ve got the blame) Did he arrive with a rubber band in his pocket? He also had a younger brother, and it may have been him instead but I doubt it. The rubber band may have also been around the dog’s neck before he arrived by one of the children – carelessly – but I knew nothing of it.

Eden once came over while I was house-sitting, and I also met up with Mark (not from Wesley) who was working in the city at the time. Interestingly, there was a police street-homicide in between that residence and the neighbour’s residence in the 80s.

Anyway, I told the family what happened when they returned and they sort of brushed it off because Rozy was almost completely healed. I don’t even know if they ever followed it up. Perhaps I should’ve taken some photos. I never saw the neighbour again – that family moved out.


✓ 9 months ago

Japan Gets Real

Along with new voices.

(updated: 16 March 2025)

I’d always known about Japan.

From a very young age, I saw the Japanese characters on the back of drink cartons, along with Astro Boy on television. Also, I pondered my mum’s use of chopsticks, her shopping for bean shoots, roasted sesame oil, tofu and soy sauce at Japan Mart and use of the wok. I also liked checking out different car brands which meant going to the motor show. Then, in 1988, I learned Japanese at school. Also, my dad’s good friend had a Japanese wife.

Next door to Japan Mart was Brent’s Toy Shop. Both those shops have become a hairdressing supply store and bicycle store respectively, and have been like that ever since – for decades.

Italy started to get real too, when I first saw a Lamborghini Countach at Brent’s in the mid-late 80’s. Over time, they actually had a few – sometimes with rear spoilers and sometimes without. Inside the store read the slogan: “What separates the men from the boys are the price of their toys.” So gazing at Pirelli P-Zeroes that were as wide as my chest is a vision I won’t forget.

I used to think “how is this even a car?” and the name was cool too. The teasing sales guy said he’d let me have the car for $5, but I needed to pay literally on the spot. Somehow he knew I had no cash on me.

Jay Leno bought one as his daily driver and said the key with Italian cars was to let them warm up before heading off. The shop also had a De Tomaso Pantera, Aston Martin, white Lotus Esprit and red Ferrari 328 GTS at different times and as the office was on a mezzanine, as I would check out cars, the staff would peer down at me.

Wallet-wise they seemed more interested in knowing about my dad than about me. Yet by 1987 we “only” had a light-green Honda Accord…

[2020]

… to hell with those Japanese 4 seaters.

I am pretty sure most of Brent’s cars were new – and multi-brand dealerships don’t exist like this anymore and perhaps that’s why it closed down – the sales guy said something about it – the auto-makers wanted large orders, not for 1 or 2 units and they wanted vertical integration.

At the time, the closest I got to driving in a Ferrari was sitting in Ron Walker‘s red Testarossa on Irving road as I rode passed a well-known residence with “Spartacus.”

[2020 | 2025 ]

Good guy… but the Americans and Japanese solved (or attempted to solve) the problem that the Italians created – I drove one in Test Drive on the 8088.

[mid + late 80’s]

…and in Out Run at the Fun Factory arcade with Mikito (see further down) about 100m up from Brent’s, but which has also since shut down.

Recently, (as of 2024) a motorcycle salesman told me point-blank that “Life’s good on a low-rider” for a 2007 Suzuki Boulevard.

Mid-life crisis averted. Thank God for the Japanese!

Yet, I’d rather an electric unicycle at this point because it carves better and co-incides with my dream flying. So whatever takes me to Downtown Venus?!?

P.M. Dawn - Downtown Venus (Live NPA Canal+)

Anyway, we had some Japanese next-door neighbours who lived in the apartment block in 1987.

In fact, I met a number of people who lived in that building because I used to hit a tennis ball against the walls in the back parking lot occasionally after school when there were no cars around, and the Body Corporate Manager’s name was Adrian too.

Incidentally, there was a proper tennis court across the road, and the owner was nice enough to let me play their as well and have tennis lessons with Doron on Saturday mornings.

But that court was eventually bulldozed for the owner’s new residence that was self-designed, while their main house was sold-off as well. In that house, during the first intifada, a guy once said that the Gaza Strip was actually a nightspot, but it took me a few years to get the pun.

But my first reaction to seeing footage of the intifada was that the IDF should throw rocks back. In Australia, if someone started throwing rocks they’d be arrested.

Also, with this mindset, the IDF to this day could launch missiles such as Katyushas (or the equivalent) into Lebanon and the territories as well. IDF becomes IPF – Israel Proportionate Force. Because if I lob a tennis ball over the fence, someone may eventually lob it back.

Why aren’t there rows of tanks and missiles in northern Israel pointed at southern Lebanon permanently, or a fleet of self-destructing FPV drones ready to go? It makes no sense – actually it makes a lot of sense depending on the perspective. Moreover, Israel should be preparing for drones carrying cold-war warheads next as being the “new Qassams” and have jammers ready to go.

In 2025, if I come across any anti-Israel rhetoric, usually I can just say something like “What are you a Muslim or something? They’ll come for you next. Haven’t you read the Quran?” Talk about useful idiots – especially Prime Minister Netanyahu (previously Milikovski) whereby from my observations, he rarely talks about the Muslim angle of the conflict and confuses Jews with Israelites and Israelites with Israelis – like so many others.

Having today’s “Israel” named directly after its predecessor from 2500 years ago (below right) when the Israelites actually existed (as the 12 tribes) doesn’t help matters either.

[ Tower of David museum, 2017 ]

If only today’s Saudis came with gold tributes for the Prime Minister as might have happened 3000 years ago.

[ ” ]

But that was before Islam and during actual Israelite Kingship.

So Jerusalem is a city that “has been fought over sixteen times in its history. During its long history, Jerusalem has been destroyed twice, besieged 23 times, attacked 52 times, and captured and recaptured 44 times.” src

[ ” ]

So I wonder, when someone buys some dates in Sweden:

Are they:

  • Actually wanting to “Re-conquer Al-Quds” rather than to “Free Palestine” as history would infer?
  • Aware that the “international day to express support for Palestine and oppose the Israeli occupation of Palestinian territories” is called “Al-Quds Day” circa 1979 – ie “Jerusalem Day.”
  • Living by the sword?
  • Aware of their own ancestral conquests and bloodshed?
  • Aware that pro-Palestinian content may in fact be sourced from certain Jews in order to turn themselves into better victims to receive more donations and support the war paradigm? This happens in Gaza as well – diverting food trucks away from those in need – creates better Palestinian victims while providing goods to sell/store and enables more content to be swallowed by useful idiots.

Let he who is without sin cast the first stone date.

All warfare is based on deception.

Anyway, so 11 or 12-yr old Mikito and a bunch of us would go to the Fun Factory and blow our coins on Double Dragon and Dragon Ninja.

Mikito was an only child and his dad was a hairdresser. I’m pretty sure their visa application was rejected and they returned to Japan. He brought over his Famicom and used it here and that was amazing to me. He struggled with English but we all made it work somehow and he was a lot of fun.

Back then, we had a Honda Accord and on my way to learning Karate in 1995, I learned Tae Kwon Do years earlier.

1

Yet mostly I dreaded Thursday’s Tae Kwon Do class because at 2 – 2.5 hours, it was so tiring and stressful. It was also a fair drive to reach the Camberwell Civic Centre. One time, the car ran out of petrol and literally rolled into the servo next door. And that’s the way the class made me feel so often.

But, under the guidance of Jack Rozinsky, I ended up with a yellow belt and two stripes before stopping. Karate in 1995 was with Sensei Joe, which I preferred.

I won an award “Most Spirited Senior” that year and was somewhat sad to give it up due to study commitments and a desire to change my physicality.

1 2 3

I threw away the trophy recently (late ’22) due to it dropping, and should’ve taken a photo before doing so. Back into the spirit realm. I remember sparring competitively with another Jewish guy double my age (Jonathan?) at the second-floor venue in Cato Street.

One of my school friends Peter was doing Chikara style Karate at the time but at a different association and when he found out about the commonality on a lunch break, he played me Pantera in his walkman. He was into the game Street Fighter II a few years earlier and used to emulate the moves he saw and take on the whole theatrical effect.

Pantera: Far Beyond Driven

Arcade Longplay [370] Street Fighter II: The World Warrior

I went to Japan in December that year too and for the first and only time,

[pic 3: Kobe post earthquake ??]

I bleached my hair with Tina in Greville Street for the school holidays.

So that trip was with Jun whose immediate family lived in Japan and I knew him from Geelong Grammar, Timbertop.

[ Jun on bottom bunk, in front of Use Your Illusion II poster ]

He had slept in the bunk next to mine and in fact, on about 3 occasions  in the middle of the night I heard (and saw) him sit up and speak a completely alien language to me.

[ At the interstellar departure gate. ]

No one else witnessed it, and he knew nothing of it personally. At the time, he was on the top bunk, not bottom. So S and Jun must’ve switched.

It wasn’t just a few words either, the monologues would go on for 2-5 minutes and were very fluent. They really should’ve woken up other people but did not.

And Jun was very often the last person to make the breakfast line-up, right after me. Re-orienting with illusion?

The lingo used for sleeping back then was “spine-bashing” and “departured” and it was a favourite pastime for many.

Today, very rarely I might hear music in my dreams – if only I could access it in waking life, like Lenny Kravitz. Perhaps people access past lives too: and languages. I had a massive download in a sleep in Jerusalem in 2005 – maybe that was Jun’s?

I should’ve tried sleeping outside.

It’s worth noting that Andrew from 4Xoverland mentioned once that part of the reason he likes 4WD’ing so much is to get away from civilisation where he has said that his soul can travel at night in a more effective way. Dream flying too? Something like that anyway.

Continuing, another school friend Sa (brown jacket below) and Jun’s cousin (pink jacket) also made it over to Japan as Jun is Australian/Japanese.

There was a lot to take in including skiing at Tenjindaira with incredible amounts of snow (compared to Mount Buller) and at one point Jun and I spent 45 minutes looking for a ski. I took a fall in the powder and somersaulted and the ski was at the top of landing spot, not down the hill where I stopped. I also recorded a video of me skiing to the base of the mountain, but the camera was on full zoom so it came out poorly.

Note the Alpine Racer game:

But it wasn’t a “game” if there was no sense of defeat, only victory or discovery.

Anyhow, in Tokyo, January 1996, I checked out the the Elvin Jones Special Quartet with Wynton Marsalis at the Tokyo Bunka Kaikan. I missed Jamiroquai by a few weeks light years.

Jamiroquai | Light Years | Live | Japan Tour 1995

Elvin Jones & Wynton Marsalis Jazz Vitoria 1997

But, by chance Prince came through a night-club that I was at with his massive entourage. I had last seen him in concert in April 1992 for Diamonds and Pearls. He played a number of shows in Japan also in January 1996. I’m not sure if he came through after his concert but I did see him from about 10 meters away despite me not trying to get a glimpse as he strutted across the dance floor to his next destination.

Prince - Love... Thy Will Be Done - January 8, 1996, Live at Budokan, Tokyo

I bought a number of CDs as well: R. Kelly self-titled, (What’s the Story) Morning Glory? (on Sa’s recommendation,) Jesus Wept and Back from the Raggedy Edge. All these albums came out a few months prior to me arriving. I really was very fortunate to be able to make the trip to Japan and am very grateful for it.

Continuing, I started Bagua and Yoga in 1997 and became vegan for a period of time. I also gave Pilates a few sessions.

But was I heading in the right direction with my menu? I was using a book to learn some of my Yoga poses. Was it enough?

I was still eager to find new voices, even if I didn’t understand them at first.

So via Sugihara, Japan provided a lifeline for my grandparents during the war on the way to Australia, so where was the next stop? Back to Japan?

TLC released tracks in 1995, which I first heard in Japan, and I mashed up in Israel in 2013.

Diggin' On You (Soulpower Remix)
I must admit to you (Sango + TLC + Britney Spears) [June 2013 - 2021]

So is that where I would find flow? And yes I did find it, quite literally…

But how do other Israelis find flow? Was defeat, victory or discovery at hand? A zero-sum game?

alike:

1 2 3 4 …

✓ 2 months ago

If nothing else, free the Left Hand!

Independence can be a way of life too.

(last updated: 4 July 2025)

[Summer – Rainbow beach]

After starting drums in 1991 with teacher Andrew Smith, right after quitting many years of piano lessons, I played in the awesome Wesley Big Band from mid-1994 until early 1996 when I left due to time pressures. Big Band people also had to play in the Concert Band as a rule.

Also, in 1994, my mum bought a:

  • Yamaha Vinnie Colaiuta 14×4.5″ signature snare
  • Paiste 15″ signature fast crash
  • Paiste 13″ signature sound edge hi-hats
  • Zildjian 17″ K dark medium-thin crash

from Manny’s Music in NYC that were all shipped back to Melbourne. Bar Mitzvah money put to good use.  Yet I ended up selling them all except the snare which I play to this day (2025.)

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The Paiste crash was incredible but the hats were awful. It was a punt – the gear was selected from reading magazines. Even my Pearl Masters kit in 1995 was selected by magazines.

I ended up with two tom-toms of the same depth and only a 2″ difference in diameter just like Vinnie’s:

[ src – purchased: red ]

Yet, I think this was a great result as the 10″ power tom sounds reasonably different to the 12″ standard tom and the difference is easy on the ear. Both the guy at the shop and my drum teacher were unnerved with the sizings – was the 16″ x 20″ bass drum really too large for jazz and too small for a rock show?

[ 27 May 2022 ]

Surely, it can be tuned up or down? Yet, decades later, the 14″ floor tom and bass drum have ended up complimenting the 2015 stand-mounted Jinbao bass-drum.

[drums switcheroo + first play] Dirty Diana (1987 + 2020)

I also had a Sabian 20″ HH medium-thin ride (below left) carried over from a few years earlier which was eventually replaced by a 20″ K Heavy.

So I used this gear in the school band competition and we won equal-first (below-left.)

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In November 2018 I remember going into a drum store and trying out the cymbals and realizing within a couple of strokes whether I liked the sound or not, but back then I didn’t really know what I wanted or what I liked.

Get to Sticks (1992 + 2018)

It’s the same with fashion – one look and it’s either on or it’s not – although it was never like that growing up.

In Big Band, Simon played drums before me and set a really “nasty” precedent for me to follow after himself and a number of members left after the band’s Montreux performance in mid-1994. I also saw him play at a Battle of the Bands at the Lauriston Fair and he would’ve been best off playing under Maurice White than anyone else.

I played in the 1997 BotB and ended up dropping a stick after cramping up, and it was a shameful moment for me… wow, that had never happened before. We’d rehearsed at my house too and I was doing a lot of the schlepping and all the carrying of amps took its toll. It was for first-time rockstar vocalist Hezza and in front of a lot of girls.

I am pretty sure Simon was playing drums that day in his band Polyester.


[same school, Out Loud in 2014]

It was such a failure on my part, I think I ended up playing with one cramped forearm for two songs (the other arm was incapacitated.) I barely even knew what a cramp was. It’s like “What the fuck is wrong with my arms!?” For Hezza, this was at a time when being on stage with a rock band was the equivalent of having a new IG account with thousands of new followers.

I really should’ve yelled out to the other band members for timeout. “Sorry peeps, the drummer can’t play anymore. Well he never really could to begin with either. Did you hear about the drummer who finished high school? Me neither.”

Hezza had such high hopes and it all ended up a train wreck of emotion. I saw him years later in the city at night with his friend and things weren’t the same. We were once such jovial pals.

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Trumpeter Ollie T along with Ben, James and Zoe (all above) were playing with me in Ska band Skaface at the time (1996.) Bas and Eden also played in it and there should be a recording from Bakehouse studios floating around somewhere.

I left Big Band in Yr 12, because it was taking too much time – really it was the setting up and packing away of the drums at rehearsals twice weekly which was the deal-breaker. I may have also had fatigue issues regardless because I quit Karate in 1996 too. Jewish Big Band drummer Buddy Rich also did Karate from 48 onward, but looking at his hunch, I think he would’ve been better off with Yoga. And with Big Band a thing of the past, so was Concert Band and I must’ve freed up about 8 hours of my week.

If I am to look back with complete honesty, I suspect my health took a hit from vxccines taken for an 89/90 trip to India – Hep A, Hep B (x 3) and Meningitis.

[ above right – all shot-up with Mr Patel in Ahmedabad at his quarry that he repopulated with wildlife after its end-of-life. In that social group, I talked science with someone. 7 years later, high school physics was my best result. Magic. ]

[ A year or two later: Mr Patel again with Satyajeet (with dogs) (Darbar Shri Satyajeet kumar Shivraj khachar of Jasdan) for his royal arranged marriage. ]

I think Patel was an engineer and I met Satyajeet very, very briefly. My grandfather Oskar knew Shivraj – Satyajeet’s father.

And today new borns are given Hepatitis B shots – all ready for a trip to India!?

So that toxicity was seemingly rectified about 12 years later due to an “energetic-cleansing” type experience.

Also, I had received 4 very large mercury/amalgam fillings from a young age and those off-gassing could’ve also caused problems. Another problem could have been the fluorescent desk lamp (near Hendrix poster, pic further down.) I’ve heard someone say that the lamps dislodge mercury in the body, and of course contain a small amount of it too.

So it’s worth noting that Pranic healing deals with healing on the subtle level before it manifests in the physical hence the expression “real-eyes realize real-lies.” Autobiography of a Yogi spoke about this.

I am not so won over by vxccines because:

  • Weren’t these nasty diseases on their way out anyway due to advances in hygiene? (the Big Kahuna question)
  • Do they actually work?
  • Are they really needed?
  • Why don’t all unvaccinated children drop dead before age 30?
  • Who’s funding the studies?
  • Are there liability exemptions?
  • Is there a profit-motive somewhere?
  • What’s the track record of governments working against the governed?
  • Are they part of binary weapons systems, eg cell-phone towers, body scanners, smart meters?
  • Are there other alterior motives?
  • Have they been mis-named (just like Israel)?
  • Is there full transparency in the production process?
  • On a purely physical level, aren’t nanometals and synthetic biology the enemies of health? Do vaccines add to that?
  • With heavy metals, one can expect parasites to co-exist with them, right? And with that comes biofilms, sludge and brain fog.

Vxccines are no substitute to raising the vibration and that can come through relaxation and flow-states. That’s fine, but what if it takes monthly colon hydrotherapy, lymphatic drainage and ozone sessions to get to that point? Medical students don’t even write a single essay in 5/6 years of study. Only short-answers. After that, they’re worked to the ground so they don’t or can’t think critically. The overwork/underpayment culture is done purposely to remove undesirable mindsets from the system. What am I missing? Probabaly a lot.

Was the late Susan Wojcicki targetted due to c19/vxccine censorship?

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If so, it’s strange to see a “bottom-up” hit – usually it’s done to the small guy for going against the prevailing winds of the industry associations and their consensus before they get traction. As Buddy Rich said:

“I used to think of myself as a tough guy. Looking back now, I wonder what’s so great about being a tough guy.” – src

So I may well have gotten fatigue, but at least I wasn’t paralyzed. I think the fatigue started to happen when more cell phone towers went up later into the 90’s and my learning ability was also hampered – but I had so much to spare, it wasn’t really noticeable from the exterior. But it may have had something to do with my amalgam fillings.

It may be worth noting that at about 6 years old in primary school, myself and all my classmates had to provide cheek swabs for some woman that came through the school. I didn’t mind – I was thrilled that she wasn’t giving us all injections.

We were also IQ-tested a year or two later, and then tested again for the propensity to disassociate as mentioned here.

Sports day was so much more straightforward, even in black shoes.

[ mid-80s, KDS, original Kooyong Rd campus | 2022 ]

Looking back, perhaps having my DNA stored somewhere unbeknownst to me was/is just as dangerous as being turned over to a possible mind-control/transgendering process to serve the beast system. Or is there a clone of me somewhere from whom I can extract something later in life?

So a human clone planet is mentioned in Ormus King 2:

and intergalactic assasinations and human replacements in Ormus King 7 whereby “humans are controlled and dominated from a far-off planet for their eventual replacement by a reptilian alien cult that hijack Earth’s technology systems.”

[March, 2021]

Anyway, there was another recording with myself, Zev, Eden and Matho done at Metropolis that I wish I still had from 1996. We got free recording time and Zev and Eden came up with a track on the spot that day. I think it was called Debowana …give me some water… It sounded a lot like Big Mistake from 1997.

Natalie Imbruglia - Big Mistake Live on Channel 5 UK

We also did a cover of Fire. I ended up giving the caseette tape to Matho at a house party one night. I should’ve given it to a venue – that really was a big mistake yet he would’ve been out of the country for the next year or two anyway so that would’ve been of no consequence. Matho wasn’t even a trained singer but sounded great. I don’t think his heart was in it.

The whole session was done to help audio engineering students and my brother put me onto “Goldsmith” who was looking for a band.

It took 3 phone calls to initially reach Matho, and that would be my 2nd last. Matho knew deep down that he wouldn’t see past his 27th birthday if anything came of the band and just wanted to dodge a bullet. Well I highly, highly doubt that… maybe me though?

So I did vaguely know one fellow Harry who died at 27 who has IG embeds on this blog.

[alike]

He may well have been following this blog leading up to his death, not sure, and none of those names above are on my FB or YT followers lists – are they super-fans or beast-system-leeches? It’s God or the devil, baby!

ANTIBOY - Devil (Official Video)

Harry had some really good insights to share, and it was/is so sad to see him leave so soon although I recently read an interesting quote: “Death is but a horizon, and a horizon is just a limitation of our view.”

He passed away at dwelling purposely setup by his family for detoxing, which is sad but I don’t know the finer details. In any case, still a great loss. His last tweet was so positive.

So back to Metropolis, not sure how happy Eden was playing bass, and Zev might’ve been wanting to sing too. Goldsmith loved the music. The biggest “close but no cigar ” moment ever.

I couldn’t think of a name for the band. Spartacus came up with “Interstellar Overdrive” for another band that had Eden in it. A year later and things may have worked out as long as we owned our masters and I would’ve been able to get a website (with MP3s) and email list going pretty quickly – even in 1997. I probably would’ve ended up hiring a drummer and played percussion or done drum programming. Maybe Zev and Eden wanted to be writing for their own groups.

So back at school, I got along well with the conductor, the late Mr Lee (not everyone did) and he was also the music school head.

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Lee sold musical instruments to students so that was pretty shrewd of him to leverage his position like that.

He played alto sax and I once lent him my Sinatra at the Sands CD that I purchased from Greville Records but I never saw it again – perhaps it flew away! In fact, the shop was up the road from my school and in uniform, I asked the shopkeeper (owner too?) what the best big band CD was and he gave me that one. I also asked for a funk tip and he gave me Curtis.

Curtis Mayfield - Curtis -1970 -FULL ALBUM

He was impressed – so was I!

Then ~10 years later I was back there with Mr Petrie asking him if he wanted to sign up to Moshtix. He was more nervous than anything, but I wasn’t! He was like “come back to me last.” He wasn’t in the ticketing business, it was a complimentary good (like the Moshcard) and it brought new people into the store.

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Petrie was really excited about this swipe card for venue entry – he envisaged it becoming a discount and customizable card for the younger generation – many of whom didn’t even have credit cards. People could’ve been sent MP3s after buying a ticket or had a collection of music attached to it.

Facebook turned down their initial acquisition offer from Yahoo in 2006, and I think Moshtix could’ve pushed off News Corp too. That’s easy to say looking back, and I wasn’t in contact with Petrie in 2008, but the word “Mosh” limited the ticketing scope to music, right? I know there was a cinema using the site at the time.

Wherever there is power, money easily follows, and the power is at the enabling interface between disparate groups or systems that need/use each other. So much money at the interface between yarn and skin. If I owned a newspaper, I’d look at buying a timber plantation, paper plant and a recycling business – keiretsu. If American companies merged with each other, they wouldn’t need such high tariffs, right? I have no idea.

I am not sure if Greville Records were one of Moshtix’s early retail sign-ons where people could buy a ticket and add it to their Moshcard. By mid-2005 Moshtix hadn’t listed their Melbourne outlets online:

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Greville Records were with OzTix by 2008, though:

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But I remember seeing GR on Moshtix at one point. Or did I? Weird. Maybe they switched over to OzTix after the 2007 Moshtix acquisition and didn’t want to associate with Big Business. Perhaps Greville Records gave the ticketer a “cool factor” that lead to greater success in Melbourne, after Sydney, and leading to the rest of Australia as a result. I have no idea.

[ Note Hendrix poster bottom left – from Greville Records ]

By mid-2005, three Melbourne venues already signed-on to use Moshtix were Bennetts Lane, The Corner and The Metro. We met those on-site and a bunch more including HiFi Bar where I came face-to-face again with Kiran (not Haslam) who I hadn’t seen since the school Big Band where he had sung. Petrie was in the dark about Melbourne’s music scene. How much did he like music? Did it really matter anyway? Kiran ended up building out HiFi’s own ticketing system but I’d have to double-check on it.
Getting Metro on board was a big win after Mr Petrie and I initially met Alistair and Anna at the venue in early 2004.

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@dannysrants Do you remember Metro Nightclub? #nightclubs #nightclub #melbourne #nightlife #clubbing #promoter #security #clubs #metro #nostalgic #throwback #rememberwhen ♬ original sound – DannyRants

Alistair, at the opposite end of a large table was like: “who’s liable if the system breaks down on the night.”
Hamish was like: “it’s never failed yet.”
Alistair: “well what happens if it does?”
Hamish: “uhmm, yes…. well…”

[ 2003 ]

It was a raw meeting as we ran through the contract and no one had even yet been short-changed. Anna in the side-office was like: “if you really want to sell a lot of tickets you either need a great act or the cool-crowd present.” Nailed it. They might’ve thought we were uncool. But when I was 13 in the early 90’s, a bunch of us had free entry into TIME underage on Saturdays there at Metro. Someone thought we were cool.

The music could be really upfront, as social media was absent and people were wanting to get accelerated attraction with “randoms.” Little by way of cyber-checkin’.

Well, that’s one theory I read anyway. Also, is it just me or did people actually look physically different back then, like DNA was of a different quality? Less autism too. My brother had a Q-Bar medallion around a decade later… so roll up anytime and then straight in.

[ 2001? ] [ src ]

But Bennetts Lane was the first sign-on, and they got on board pretty soon after the first meeting using their new “tickets direct” page and the chap told us the frequent ticket queues stretching down the lane were a real problem and that’s why he wanted to sign up so badly.

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Who said jazz heads were stuck in the past? More like stuck in a lane!

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In the end, friendships, commission, equity or a wage, nothing really eventuated from Moshtix. Yet due to my newly acquired hearing issues, I think it would’ve been a nightmare getting into the live music scene during 2004 and beyond. Imagine troubleshooting a swipe reader or being invited to late-night drinks and wanting to leave after 1 minute. Free the legs. At least all my Groovetip work paid off… for others! I’d have to settle with karma points and a good story! The whole “kiss up, kick down” mentality and vying to become an apex predator ultimately never works in a co-operative universe.

Mr Petrie went on to build Taxi-app ingogo, but from my understanding was ejected by the investors 7.5 years in, and the app has since shut down without an exit. We had some good conversations and he was talking about taxis and standing desks even back in Sydney.

Real Life - Send Me An Angel '89

Anyway, Sonny Payne – killer drummer. “He was Frank Sinatra’s personal drummer for all of the singer’s live appearances with Count Basie and his big band in 1964 and 1965 and 1966; in fact, whenever Sinatra sang with Basie in the 1960s, Payne was the drummer.” – src

A band is never better than its drummer and Frank knew it.

Frank Sinatra - Luck Be A Lady

The Chairman of the Board backed-up by the drummer. Interestingly, Andrew left me a heap of jazz records and I still have them to this day.

But reading the Mile Davis autobiography during that time – great read – really helped me put Jazz into perspective.

Following on from this, it wasn’t really that cool to be in a Big Band and the drumming is quite challenging – anticipating all the band lines. And in the Big Band, I never really dialled into the importance of “double-stroke roll triplets” until many years later – crucial for jazz playing. It’s a type of poly-rhythm that can really empower a drummer to put all their rudiments into a triplet feel. And that’s what life is all about – seeing the normal things through new lenses!

Also, the “Rock and Roll” style is about switching from straight-ahead grooves to these triplet fills. Going from rock to roll. Think Bonham.

I play a triplet at 45 secs:

[switcheroo drums] Bon Jovi - Blaze of Glory (1990 + 2020)

School uniforms aside, Angus Young has said he even likes the beats slightly swung, not just the fills.

So around 1996 I saw Julian Joseph at The Continental Cafe in Greville Street with Charlie (see below.) After the show, the drummer Mark told me that to be a good funk player it really helps to be a good jazz player in order to free up the left hand.

Mark Mondesir Drum Lessons: You only need 7 Rudiments!! - Heavy Groovin! #drummerworld

My goal is to have it to the point where it almost needs to be attached with a leash!

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related:

Fretless bass player Charlie on the right:

pics
palette.fm
www.vinniecolaiuta.com/Interviews/ModernDrummer1993
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